Appreciation Is Not Demanded For

I have often been accused of being unappreciative by some people very close to me. The reason for this accusation is that I don't say thank you for everything someone does for for me. Those who say this tell me often when we are trying to sort out some differences in our relationship or working and some have told other people who come and tell me why our friendship or relationship is not going well.
    Since we live in a world where we need to encourage one another, I would like to encourage those of you who have been accused of the same "crime". Do not worry about what others say because if you look closely into the word of God, you will discover that thankfulness which is defined as "warm friendly feelings of gratitude thankfulness - appreciativeness and also gratefulness is actually an attitude which is wrought in us by the Holy Spirit who lives in us. If the Holy Spirit lives in a person, He makes the person live and conform to a Christlike life. So if a friend does something that pleases you, you automatically show feelings of appreciation through many other ways of expression. You really do not need to verbalize it. Some people cry, some just keep quiet and others speak it out.   So if you are being accused of being unappreciative, may be the mistake is not yours but the person who is accusing you of the same. May be he or she does not understand these other ways of appreciation that are varied and personal. They may have wanted us to do things their own way.
     Among the married people, I would like to say that appreciation is not demanded for. God never demands. Most of those who give to others and then feel that the others should have said a BIG THANK YOU and gone ahead to write it on their forehead, may be termed selfish because we are encouraged to give without expecting anything in return and this includes appreciation. DON'T GIVE  FOR THE SAKE OF BEING APPRECIATED! It is selfish. Thankfulness is an attitude and is formed in us from childhood. I speak from an African perspective here. Husbands in African cultures have a very different way of showing appreciation to their wives.
       Appreciation among African couples in marriage could be seen in the way a husband provides, protects, and cares for the wives. From among the people I come from, there is not one word that can be given to the English word THANK YOU. The Kiswahili word Ahsante and its synonym Arabic word Shukrani are now used by the Luhya dialect speakers especially Asante. The words that are used among the Luhyas are Embwo, orio muno, urio munno, and the variants which directly translated,literally mean   "like that" or "in the same way" "likewise" etc. Which actually may be intended to encourage the giver to continue doing good or giving in the same way. The English equivalence would be Well done, good job,   or bravo which are used as a way of praising someone and saying that you are pleased about and approve of something they have done. That is to mean, in the African context, you do good for your good. You give to others for your own good. When you buy food for a needy child, a widow, or a staving family, you are doing that for your own good as someone pointed out that... thankfulness improves our physical and emotional health. Holding on to feelings of thankfulness boosts our immune system and increases blood supply to our heart. So do not expect your wife to say thank you when you pay fees for the children or when you do your part in marriage do it as unto God. God never shouts THANK YOU from the heavens but He really appreciates what we do.
    In other words here, I mean to say, if you help others expecting them to say "thank you" is being selfish. In Kiswahili, we say tenda wema wende zako. ( do good or show kindness and go your way) Therefore lets us not get tired of doing good. The Apostle Paul wrote in Colossians 3:15  And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. God is Good and God is Great!.